What Would You Do?
by Dr. Linda Phillips-Jones (in memoriam) slightly edited by Dr. G. Brian Jones
     
 

You’re the coordinator of your organization’s mentoring initiative. One of the mentees comes to you asking you to rematch her with a different mentor since her current one “isn’t interested in being a mentor.”

Upon further questioning, you learn that she and her mentor had one meeting, which seemed to go well. Her mentor then had his administrative assistant cancel the next two scheduled meetings due to his busy travel schedule. Through his assistant, he passed along the message that he was willing to review the mentee’s development plan if she e-mailed it to him.

What would you do in this situation? How would you advise the mentee? The mentor? Choose one of the four possible answers below and compare your response with the reactions that follow.

a. Agree to find the mentee a new mentor. E-mail the former mentor about the change.

b. Ask the mentee to be patient and to give the relationship more time. Call or e-mail the mentor to determine the probability that he'll be able to be more involved in the future of this current partnership.

c. Encourage the mentee to be proactive about the situation. Suggest that she leave a voicemail or e-mail for her mentor thanking him for his efforts so far and asking if he’d prefer to end their partnership and perhaps resume it another time.

d. Offer to be the mentee’s assigned mentor. Let the former mentor play an informal mentor role as his schedule permits.

Our Reactions to the Choices

a. This is a possible choice, especially if this is a recurring pattern for this mentor and you have an available substitute mentor (other than yourself). However, especially if this is a valuable mentor, you and the mentee may want to take some additional steps before making this major change.

b. This could be a first step, especially if the mentor is very valuable, expressed a strong interest in mentoring, and has an unusual, temporary situation to handle. However, it places the responsibility on you, rather than on the mentee to improve the situation.

c. Although you’re wise to urge the mentee be proactive, it may sound abrupt to suggest ending the relationship this soon. Instead, urge the mentee to leave a message thanking him and asking to talk about schedules and the best way to work together given this mentor's other important responsibilities. If he responds to her, seems committed, and proposes different logistics, help the mentee try to get comfortable with a new approach.

d. Not a wise choice. If you’re coordinating the initiative, you probably won’t have time to be an effective mentor, too. Plus you’ll give the message that you’re an available substitute, and others may also defer to you.

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