What is distance mentoring anyway? Is it really mentoring? How can anyone mentor someone in a different city? How can we build trust without being face to face?

If you're like most mentoring leaders, or if you've been approached to participate in a long-distance mentoring partnership yourself, these questions must be answered.

Here's what we've learned about this fairly new (at least by this name) phenomenon, which we believe is not only here to stay but is a potentially powerful strategy for helping people develop.

What Is It?

You'll hear and see the terms virtual mentoring, remote mentoring, telementoring, distance mentoring as well as offshoots such as eMentoring. They all mean the same thing: a mentoring relationship in which two parties (or the members of a mentoring group) are in different locations (areas of a large city, cities, states/provinces, countries).

The participants rely almost exclusively on electronic tools (e-mail, online meeting software and platforms, videoconferencing), phones, voicemail, faxes, and mail. The parties may meet face to face one or more times during their partnerships, but most of the time they're apart.

Why Use It?

Studies of mentors, mentees, and mentoring programs indicate that sometimes the most effective mentor or mentee (in terms of skills, knowledge, attitudes, experiences, contacts) is located elsewhere. Depending on what the mentee wants to develop, mentor location is less important than these other factors.

For example, in Hewlett-Packard Company's highest level leadership development programs, high potential/high performing mentees are paired with people who can most help them excel. Those senior managers and individual achievers are often on the other side of the globe. Microsoft Corporation does the same in its innovative companywide career mentoring initiative. For years, HP has also had an outstanding e-mail based program for adult mentors and youth. The Association of Research Librarians and the Center for Health Leadership link mentor-mentee partnerships across states and time zones.

Here are some more reasons to use distance mentoring.

• Many mentors travel extensively.

  Even if mentors and mentees are located in the same location, one or both may travel most of the time. Consequently, for most of the time they must use distance mentoring strategies in order to be successful.

• The uniqueness of it lends focus.

  Distance mentoring provides, for many, the ability to focus more intently. Since time is typically limited and participants want the time to count, meetings are planned in advance, agendas are exchanged, and both "get down to business" rather quickly. When partners are nearby, it can be easy to cancel, get caught up in chatting, or drift away from planned goals.

• Many shy participants find it easier to communicate.

  Many partners find they can have deeper discussions when they aren't face to face. As one mentee put it, "I can say things on the phone or in e-mail that I might feel a little funny saying to him in person."

• New learning occurs.

  Finally, being in different locations increases at least two types of learning. Having to use the tools and strategies helps participants get skilled at and comfortable with these technologies, which are going to expand in all areas of personal and professional lives).

It also acquaints participants with unfamiliar cultures and geographies. Working with the Veterans Health Administration, The Mentoring Group learned that one purpose of their distance mentoring is to acquaint future leaders (the mentees) with practices and traditions of different parts of the Administration and well as of the U.S. They hope that the familiarity gained from working with the distance mentors will make the upcoming leaders more culturally savvy and willing to and even excited about being relocated elsewhere.

Is It Really Mentoring?

Yes, provided the mentor is going out of his/her way to use an intentional mentoring process and set of mentoring skills to help the mentee identify important life goals and build competence to reach them. In addition, the mentee must receive and use the assistance she/he is given.

A Critical First Step in Distance Mentoring

Before you or your organization attempt distance mentoring, check your beliefs and feelings about this strategy. If you're stalling, you may need to make a paradigm shift in your thoughts and emotions. Choose to recognize it as a viable strategy, build enthusiasm for it, and find ways to maximize its benefits and reduce its disadvantages.