Mentoring Ideas | Tips for Mentors | Tips for Mentees
 
Basics for Mentors, Part 2
by Dr. Linda Phillips-Jones
   
 

In July 2006, this column included some “basics” for mentors. You learned that to be effective in a mentor role, you’ll be wise to:

1. Have a good rationale for being (or not being) a mentor.

2. Don’t say “yes” or “No” too quickly.

3. Recognize all you have to offer. (This includes personal and professional experiences, skills, knowledge, lessons learned, ability to give objective outside opinions, etc.)

4. Negotiate several factors. (Include how long the structured part of your relationship is likely to last, how often and where you’ll meet, what the mentees will work on, etc.)

Here are four more essential strategies to consider.

5. Help your mentees lead the process.

The new trend is for mentees (not mentors) to direct and manage the relationships. Some mentees are very comfortable with this arrangement and, in fact, push a little too hard. Help them learn sensitivity and protocol that they can use with you and future helpers.

Others will be so shy that they’ll passively wait for you to suggest and do everything. Help them learn how to manage you, and reinforce them for taking those important steps.

6. Encourage frequently.

One of the best things you can do is provide your mentees with positive feedback on their performance and character traits. One key way to do this is to use sincere phrases. “I believe in you.” “You can do it.” “You did a terrific job of explaining that complicated procedure to your assistant.” “I like the way you laugh at your children’s jokes.” “You’re a very honest individual. I admire your integrity.”

These are just examples; you can think of dozens or even hundreds more. Research indicates that such positive reinforcement from a respected person (you) helps your mentees learn faster and better.

7. Let your mentee know what you’re getting from the relationship.

Most mentees feel a little awkward receiving focused attention and help for an extended period of time. They’d like to know that you’re enjoying and benefiting from the relationship. They may even wonder why you’re doing this.

Make your mentoring meetings a top priority, and prove that they are by never canceling or being late and never taking a phone call during a meeting (unless it’s a big emergency). Mention specific things you’re learning from your mentee (“I just learned something from you. I had no idea I could do that with my cell phone camera.” “Thanks for teaching me some new things I can try with my employees.” “You’re helping me recognize how much I enjoy being a mentor!” “I never had a chance to say thanks to my first mentor, so this is a small way I can pass on his investment in me.”)

8. Be ready to transition when it’s time.

Mentoring relationships go through phases, and when your mentees have learned a sufficient amount, it’s natural to transition into different arrangements. This is important for you and your mentees. Perhaps your relationships will go from formal/structured mentoring to informal mentoring. Perhaps they’ll turn into business friendships or even close personal friendships. Maybe you’ll become the mentee and your former mentees will mentor you in key areas.

Anticipate these transitions, talk about them, and help them go smoothly. Even if your transition is what we call “Thanks and goodbye,” make it a positive, satisfying departure, leave the door open for future contact, and express appreciation for all you’ve gained.

For more ideas on being an effective mentor, see our Products and Archive.

   
   
 
 
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